medicine

Im in a rotation right now where I shadow doctors in a hospital.  I wake up, take my caffeine and diet pills and sit in a corner of a room where these doctors discuss the cases of the patients on there service and I mentally masturbate.  I do not contribute to the process, I just sit there thinking about how Im going to eat lunch twice and watch a lot of cable TV.  Sometimes I jot down notes of procedures/tests/terms that are foreign to me in a vain attempt to look interested and busy.

Im out of there everyday at about noon and I engage myself in a deep ritual of eating as many carbohydrates as possible before I get back on the 4 train.  I call it the reverse atkins.   Its working pretty well with cigarettes and coffee. 

Sometimes I wonder why I play the roll of Gweneth Paltrow in 'The Royal Tennenbaums.'  Im a closet smoker.  Instead of estee lauder perfume I use some cheap shit spray called Raw Power that I purchased at target.  It does a great job at masking the smell of parliaments, as well as make me out to be an overzealous teen who has gone a little carzy on the cologne.

I went to target last week and bought a whole bunch of junk that ties my apartment together.  I don't really need any of it, but maybe Im just a socialist trapped in a wanna be yuppie capitalist's body who's bored.  i got to the cash register at Tarje (I cant figure out how to insert an accent on the e there) and my credit card didnt work.  Turns out the credit card company reduced my credit that week due to an overdue balance of student loans that I failed to defer being that Im in a residency program, I was just too dim witted or lazy to take care of that on time.  So I used my debit card to pay for it.  Im now negative 300 bucks on my ledger. 

The moral of the story is that this rotation is melting my mind in a sense.  Im doing a lot of bright things and reaping the rewards.